It seems not only do we communicate with words and gesture but clear obvious energetic emotional pulses. And me not being the naturally domesticated woman, these energetic ques speak to my inTj person. Here’s the phases I’ve noticed imminate from my three children. Because let’s face it, they’re extraordinary emotional beings too, and naturally more inclined towards genuine emotions than an us, adulterated by years of being told how and what to feel. Babies, especially newborns, exemplify basic human energetic emotion in order to illicit hormonal and instinctual responses from persons in their proximity.
Phase one! The bored whimper or cry. This says: mom im done! Next thing please! And the younger they are the more practical need based this whimper is. Maybe they’re sleepy or hungry or bored
Phase two! Pattern crying that says hey you’ve left me too long! Alert alter! I’m in need of something alert! This cry is very rhythmic. It’s the basic wah wah wah. If they’re hungry there’s more pain in the cry. It’s more shrill. If they’re tired it’s mostly the same as feeling abandoned, yet can be slightly hoarse or deep. If it’s a painful cry after you fed and such then likely you’re in a growth spurt.
Phase three! Im pissed! Older babies get here pretty fast when they fight sleep. But you can tell this is a tiny angry person! Some people get have a more intense emotional spectrum so even your most charming angel can head here in minutes. How dare you!!!
Phase four! The cry of the ever broken heart. Sometimes babes can skip the anger and just be hurt. But this is usually do to fatigue in my experience. I suppose it could happen as an emotional response at any time for their own reason. But the cry is personal and sounds like thu thu thu thu. A deep pause is often followed by the deep exhale of a gutteral cry. This cry isn’t often accompanied with pain, such as; poopy diaper, gas, growing pain or hunger. It’s seen most with separation anxiety, or irritability etc.
Phase four! The scream. Yeah. Love it. This alarm is pain. Simply put check for hair tourniquets and other discomforts. And then…..
After I allow my baby at any age to express their emotion, whether it’s because I had to attend to their other siblings pressing need or they had a nightmare, the best thing in the world has been discovering the reset!
Since their attention span is so short you can offer them gentle distractions at night and many more during the day, to disrupt the brains attachment to the emotion yet acknowledging with the response needed. So if you know your baby would be soothed with a paci but is just caught up in an angry fuss, we can offer them a distraction, such as; unswaddling and walking around and then reswaddling or with my son I could put on a hat and take it off. He would be so concerned with the change in his environment that the paci became less of an offense!
My newborn will become so offended with fatigue. Fatigue is the hardest to distract them from because they’re so ply too tired to care and they’re busy telling u and feeling it. Remember we need an emotional reset not just physical. So I’ll put on music then turn it off which usually doesn’t work with my latest baby. Next I’ll offer her the breast and take it away. She becomes so offended I offered her milk and took it away she forgets how tired she is. I switch breasts and thus location reset for her, and she suckles and is asleep within minutes! You can do this with many things. Older babies I let them feel their emotion and then give them a reason to feel something else. Like the offense of nipple rejection or the shock of a diaper change or the loss of my arms!
We don’t have to force our babies to feel and respond according to what we know they need but we can show them how to calm down and receive the assistance. I’ll never forget my daughter in the throes of emotion, after offering her lovey to her and her throwing it in a fit, responding with delight when the lovey was reintroduced after I offered her a toy she didn’t like for a few minutes. Reset. Even babies are entitled to feel and have a dynamic of emotional responses most passionate and intense which we can navigate but also begin to understand the energy they’re working with to help them soothe and respond to themselves! Good luck!